Three perspectives: on judgement about food, five love languages and when do people feel included
Three perspectives to help you understand the art of inclusion
Happy Sunday!
Here are three perspectives to further your understanding of inclusion:
A perspective from our founder:
“People might 'judge' me for sometimes buying lunch at uni rather than bringing it from home.
But the reality is,
1. It is physically challenging for me to cook food independently
2. When I am at uni, grabbing something on the go is often easier
3. Cooking is not a strength of mine so it is better for me to invest my time into things that I am good at rather than things I am not.
Do you judge people who buy lunch out, rather than bringing it from home?
Why or why not?”Read Satria’s Linkedin post here
A perspective from our research findings this week:
Our Founder has recently read The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman as well as Finding Your People by Alexandra Hourigan and Sally McMullen.
These books have introduced Satria to the five love languages, and the belief that every person adopts a primary love language. Chapman coined these 5 Love Languages, and he theorised that it is important for couples to identify their partner’s primary love language.
Image description: the 5 love languages
Source: https://vivianbaruch.com/vivian-baruch-relationship-coach-counsellor-accredited-sex-therapist-clinical-supervisor/free-stuff-3/toolkit/gary-chapman/
As Hourigan and McMullun point out in their aforementioned book: Finding Your People by Alexandra Hourigan and Sally McMullen, the theory is “far from perfect”, as it isn’t backed by science, is written through a hetronormative lens and condones stereotyping people based on their primary love language.
However, they do raise an excellent point that these love languages can be used in other types of relationships (i.e. friendships):
“Whilst an ideal friendship doesn't have to consist of people with identical love languages, it is important to at least be aware, so you can make a conscious effort to do things that give your friends the warm and fuzzies”
Both books detail how to apply these theories in our everyday relationships; however, we won’t recount them here due to copyright laws.
With that being said, all five love languages and ways that they can be applied can be pretty self-explanatory, if we apply them to our own everyday lives.
Two questions for you to think about:
What might be your primary love language?
How might you be able to ask the people in your life about their primary love language?
3. A perspective from you:
Last week, we posted the following question on our socials:
When was a time you felt included by those around you?
Here are some more responses we got this week:
“When my friends organise hang-out sessions around my mobility, and don't shame me for having sensory aversions to certain foods”
“Having the chance to do work experience at a Gymnastics Centre working with kids and doing admin work with the staff and the staff taking me on as one of their own and not seeing me as my disability but as a person”
“When people use language that doesn't make assumptions!”
If you want to contribute any perspectives that you have as to how people can better promote inclusion in their everyday life, comment on our recent Instagram post or get in touch with us via our website.
That is all for this week.
Please let us know if you have any questions, and don’t forget to spread the word about this newsletter so we can continue to reach as many people as possible.
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Showing people this photo might do the trick.
And even if they don’t subscribe, it might make them smile or laugh:))))
We hope you get to do something that brings you joy this week.
